Glue-sticking Days

As Toby headed out the door this morning, he turned to Evie and said, "Have a good day!" She responded, "That won't be hard to do." I love the power of now in an eight-year-old's brain. She was in the living room building a plastic cup and cardboard box tower with her sisters and it was hard for her to imagine how a day that started off so well could be anything but fabulous.

Sometimes, as an adult, it's challenging to have that much confidence that everything is and will be good, but for kids it happens naturally. Of course, it cuts both ways when you're eight. If Toby had talked to her about her day ten minutes later, when the glue wasn't sticking and Noni was scribbling all over one of the boxes, she probably would have responded that she was bound to have a terrible, no good, very bad day.

When you're an entrepreneur, or married to one, you tend to have some days when the glue won't stick and when other people are scribbling all over your boxes. Toby and I, recognizing that we chose this lifestyle, try to view those days as part of the adventure. Those are the days when we grow as individuals and our marriage strengthens as we support each other. It's good to have days like that from time to time, even though it doesn't usually feel like it in the moment. But? I'll be the first to admit that the days when the glue is sticking are more easily enjoyed.

The past few days have been glue-sticking days. On Thursday, Toby presented Kapost at the TechStars conference. I know I'm slightly biased, but I think he, Mike and Nader put together a knock-it-out-of-the-ballpark presentation. That evening, my friend Brenda took the three girls (Noni's first sleepover!) so that Toby and I could go out to celebrate. For us, celebrating success in Toby's work is also a celebration of our ability to stay living in Boulder, a town we have quickly grown to love. Then, in the serendipitous way that things sometimes happen, we had plans for camping on a lake with friends this weekend. It seemed the perfect way to celebrate, even though we made the reservations when there was still snow on the ground, long before I'd even heard of TechStars. I'll let the pictures below describe the weekend.

Eckhart Tolle teaches that we should "realize deeply that the present moment is all you have. Make the NOW the primary focus of your life." Words to live by at all times of course. But over these last few days, it's been easier than ever to think, "that won't be hard to do."

Toby jumping into the clouds. Well, actually the lake.

Evie and I head out on the canoe

Noni, campfire cook

Lu & friends

St.Vrain

When we moved to Los Angeles two years ago, I figured our camping equipment would sit in the garage, acquiring dust. I had no idea that Los Angeles was surrounded by some of the best camping sites I've ever seen, and that all of them would be empty on the weekends. We camped more often than we ever had that year. On the flip side, I expected that in Boulder we might as well leave our camping equipment out in the living room, as we'd probably be heading out every weekend. It hasn't quite happened that way. It's not that we haven't tried. It's that every time we make reservations at a campsite for the weekend, a hail and snow storm heads our way. Even in June. And so, after living in Colorado for nearly a year, before this weekend we had gone camping once. And it was freezing. Actually, a few degrees below.

This weekend, we decided to fool the weather gods and didn't make reservations at all. We headed up to the trail head by the St. Vrain river, where you can pitch a tent pretty much anywhere. We set ours up as near to the car as we could, which still meant a five minute walk along a fairly rugged trail with the girls and a whole lot of camping equipment. The nearest site we could find was practically in the river. When I looked out of our tent, I felt like we might start floating downstream. It was absolutely beautiful though and the girls played in the river all afternoon. When it started to cool off, we cooked sausage and asparagus over the fire and then ate far too many s'mores. Then we walked down to our friends' campsite down the river and the girls spent the evening running around the woods with their friends.

All in all, it was a great trip. The best part of the weekend was that the weather gods were completely fooled, offering up sunny, 75-degree weather all weekend. I'm already looking forward to two more camping trips we have planned in August. Shhh, just don't tell the weather gods.

walking in the St. Vrain river

Colorado Camping

We just got back from our first Colorado camping trip. Hard to believe it's our first, as we are pretty much in camping country and have lived here for ten months already. Then again, it started snowing eight months ago and still hasn't completely stopped so I guess it makes sense. Actually, it looked like it might snow this weekend. Or hail. Or thunder. All week, we kept checking an increasingly gloomy weather report. Then we woke up Saturday morning to sunshine, packed up the car and were on our way. (That isn't, I should mention, to say that it wasn't cold. It was sunny but cool during the day and then dropped to 28 degrees at night. But gathered around the campfire and then snuggled up in our 20 degree sleeping bags (and grateful for that extra eight degrees), we were always comfortable.)

Here's what I love about camping: No computers, television, or even cell phones; spending an entire day and night outside, under the sun or stars; singing and listening to guitar by the campfire; the s'mores of course, but also all the other food that tastes that much better when eaten in the fresh air.

Then, and because of all that I listed above, there's what Toby mentioned today: the whole slowing down of life that comes with camping. We kept talking about how strange and wonderful it felt to just sit in our camp chairs for most of the afternoon and evening. At home, there's always a million chores to be done, but when you're camping, there's no reason not to sit and just enjoy the fire and company of friends and family. It's such a wonderful way for our family to spend time together too because everyone is happy. I realized yesterday that Noni can spend hours throwing stones into water and all three girls can disappear into the tent for endless pillow fights.

My favorite memory from our trip is sitting around the fire after dinner - Bob and Toby were playing guitar, Max was playing drums, and they began to make up songs. Everyone contributed to the lyrics. At one point I looked around the fire and saw that everyone was laughing together. Cold or no, it felt like the way things ought to be.

Going glamping

Do you love the idea of camping but hate the hassle of setting up a tent? Want to sleep under the stars, but find your aching back disagreeing with the idea? Well ladies and gentlemen, I have a solution for you. Introducing "glamping" or glamour camping - a cross between a campsite and a four star hotel. We gave it a try at El Capitan this weekend. Our thoughts? We're sold.

In case you are imagining yourself packing stilettos and a little black dress for your weekend of glamour, I should let you know that glamping isn't exactly glamorous. You'll still have skunks crawling by your cabin at night and your kids are likely to leave with skinned knees and burrs in their hair. But you can enjoy all the benefits of camping without really roughing it. El Capitan provides you with either a cabin (complete with a shower, bathroom and kitchen) or a tent (with comfy bedding and showers and restrooms in a building nearby). We opted for a tent, which my dad said reminded him of an old gold mining tent. Too bad we didn't try out mining in the nearby creek...

The campgrounds are located about 20 miles north of Santa Barbara, nestled in a quiet valley near the beach. The whole layout reminded me of the pictures in Uno's Garden, Toby's favorite kids' book, which is a story of how man and animal should live harmoniously together in balance. We went with some friends who also have three girls and about seven other families who live near them in the Cheviot Hills neighborhood of Los Angeles. Evie spent the weekend on her bike, exploring the valley trails with a bike gang of about 15 kids. Lu and Noni enjoyed the pool, the playground, and just playing outdoors. I had one of the best runs of my life up a wooded trail to the top of a hill, which provided a 360 degree view of the ocean, the organic gardens, llamas and the mountains. We all enjoyed dancing to live music at Saturday night's barbecue. And of course there was plenty of time for s'mores, tequila and music by the campfire.

We're not giving up regular old camping anytime soon. There are lots of places to explore and few places that offer luxury camping accomodations. Plus, at $155 a night for the family, it's not quite as cost effective as paying $5 for a campsite. But we'll definitely be back to El Capitan. And for all of you not-quite-so-outdoorsy Los Angeles friends reading this, we're bringing you with us!


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Anza Borrego

For those of you that read Toby's blog (www.communitas.tumblr.com), this may be a bit repetive... but I felt I had to write about our weekend in the desert so here it is!

I had never even heard of Anza Borrego before last Sunday. At a dinner party, I met a director who has traveled around the world for work. We were talking about camping and he said that in all of his travels, one of the most beautiful places he's ever been is just three hours from Los Angeles, the Anza Borrego desert in the springtime. Every year, for one to three weeks in March, all of the desert flowers bloom at once. I decided then and there that we had to go.

When I got home, I looked up Anza Borrego only to find that the desert flowers had just bloomed and we had a week to get there before the sun dried them up. We searched campsites, hotels, and even houses to rent but everything was booked. Disappointed, I decided our trip would have to wait until next year. Then on Thursday morning, a friend pulled up in the driveway and asked if we were going to Anza Borrego or what. It turns out that you can camp anywhere in the park. No need for a campsite as long as you're willing to bring in your own water and pee in the desert sand. A day, some quick packing, and an overstuffed minivan later, we found ourselves headed for the desert.

I had a few reservations about our desert excursion. As I strapped 19-month-old Noni into the car seat, I couldn't help but consider that while four other families decided to join us in our last minute adventure, three of the wives were staying home because they were worried about bringing their babies camping in a place that offers temperatures in the low 40s at night, which frankly seemed like a reasonable concern. Moments before bringing Noni out to the car, I had also foolishly googled "wildlife in Anza Borrego" and was greeted with images of tarantulas, scorpions, rattlesnakes and mountain lions. I tried my best to put the images out of my mind, but they resurfaced in the pamphlets at the Anza Borrego visitor center anyway. (Fortunately my friend Steph waited until we returned to email me that a tarantula had climbed onto her backpack during her last visit to the park.)

My first few moments at the park confirmed my fears of bringing a baby to the desert. Noni ran up to a cactus and then drew back crying, prickers and a piece of the cactus attached to her hand. I immediately pulled it off of her, only to find the cactus stuck to my own fingers.
But after some minor pain and a few minutes with the tweezers, we were on our way through the desert, in awe at the landscape we were seeing outside the car window.



Moments later, we pulled over at the sight of probably twenty sculptures of horses dotting the landscape. (See photo of one below.) Noni insisted on running up and kissing each "neigh".


After that, we headed to our campsite in Hawk Canyon. The campsite was perfect - sheltered from the wind, surrounded by desert flowers and just below rock walls to hike up for sweeping views of the park. We set up camp and headed out for a hike.


In the late afternoon, our friends arrived. I loved that at a moment's notice, everyone had packed up and driven hours away to this remote spot in the desert. The kids played by a sand hill near our campsite until it got dark. Then we all bundled up for the cool desert night and sat around the campfire, talking, singing and eating incredible food. (See photo below) The only bit of sadness for me was knowing that my sister and her family were also camping this weekend - but across the country in South Carolina. It would be nice to live close enough to camp in the same spot.




Overall, Anza Borrego proved far tamer than I had feared (no scorpions or mountain lions on this trip) and even more magical than I had imagined. I'm putting Anza Borrego in the springtime up there with Machu Picchu at sunrise as one of those things that everyone should try to see once. It was a great way to kick off our once-a-month-camping-trip that we're planning from now through October. (If you're interested in coming along, let Toby know so he can put you in his Facebook camping group!) Now I'm off to shake out sleeping bags and shoes...and am hoping we didn't bring any desert creatures with us on the way home!